I cry

Isn't it weird how disconnected you can feel from people around you, close to you, people you can see, talk to and touch? Or, how you can feel like you connect with someone you've never had the good grace to meet? That you have some sort of understanding and common ground, even though the only way you can feel it is through words, music and distant impressions? Some people just have souls that reach out to you, guide you and watch over you, regardless of wether they know you exist or not. He doesn't know I exist, and I am aware of that. But I know he does, and to me, in my life, that has made a world of difference. I am forever grateful and and will always have endless love for him.

Lamb - I cry
One day I met a precious soul
Whose words had touched my heart
His poetry resounded so
It tore my soul apart
But when I tried my thoughts to speak
Emotion made my mind so weak
And time stood still for years and years
I bathed him in my tears

I cried, I cried
Tears of joy tears of pain
I cried, I cried
Tears of love again and again

Some people turn to pills and things
To help them through the day
To take them up or down or just
To ease the blues away
But me I really want to feel
The ups and downs of life so real
Happy or sad emotions reign
My tears flow just the same

I cried, I cried
Tears of joy tears of pain
I cried, I cried
Tears of love again and again

Gonna burn so completely I leave no trace

Though so many out there would laugh in my face
For wearing emotion so close to the skin
Condemn me they might if to love's such a sin

Counting down to exam day...

Song of the day: Depeche Mode - Shine

I've been fever- and painfree for a while now, but I'm still not feeling quite myself. As per usual after the flu, I get this horrid cough that lingers on for weeks, causing me to not sleep very well at all. As a result I didn't fall asleep properly until 6 this morning, overslept and missed my first lecture of the day. In 7 days I'll be having an exam, so part of me felt that I should've been there, but I'm not getting much out of zooming through diseases, viruses and bacteriae with the speed of light - writing notes and studying on my own works much better, so that's what I did for four hours. Not sure how much of it that's actually sticking, though - I'm having trouble keeping umpteen different contagions and their diseases apart. I'm confident I'll pass, that's for sure, but I think I can forget about that A I've been aiming for. I blame the swineflu.

What else is going on? Not much, honestly. Oh, wait! My fellow devotional and fanatic fangirl Sigrid, who went with me to Arvika this summer, has decided to come with me to London in December, and has booked the flight, a hotel room and gotten herself a ticket to the same show I have! I didn't think it was possible to look forward to that trip any more than I already am, but apparently it is! Now I have someone to obsess and discuss and go "fap fap fap" to after the concert! Now, if only she hadn't brought to my attention that tickets for the show the previous day are available on Ebay at not-so-horrible prices... *grumble*

1.	fap	6970 up, 740 down
	September 8, 2007 Urban Word of the Day The onomatopoeic representation of masturbation. Often used to suggest that something is attractive. Did you see those Natalie Portman pics? *fap fap fap*

Also, today, I became a member of Arsenal Norway! And my livingroom now looks like this ^^

Shake the disease. Again.

Still alive, but just barely. Managed to contract the flu. Might even be the swine flu, I don't know, the doctor couldn't check because the laboratories don't have the capacity to check anymore. Will resume blogging and posting when I'm capable of being awake for more than an hour at a time, and coughing without loosing a lung. This is so typically me, isn't it?

My mailbox is nice to me!

The past few days my mailbox has been very nice to me. That's the way I choose to percieve it anyway. You could argue that it's me that's been nice to me, since I have paid for this stuff after all. But that doesn't sound as fun as having a nice, giving, loving mailbox. To quote the great Adam Savage -

I reject your reality and substitute my own.

Yesterday I got my tickets for the "intimate" DM-show in Horsens, Denmark. Boy, those danes are fast - I only bought the tickets on Monday. Getting quite a collection of these tickets now, and my paranoia and concern for their safety grows exponentially each time I get some in the mail. What if I have a break-in? Or a fire? Maybe I should get a safe? Nah, too expensive. Put them in dad's safe? No, that would only lead to questions like: "What?! Are you going to all these concerts?! How much did all this cost?!" Not tempting. I'll take my chances and keep them at home, out of reach from my dog. My mailbox did also provide me with another few records for my collection - The Singles 81-85, and the Stripped single. These are almost as precious as the tickets, mind.

My mailbox have to be in a good mood, because today it provided me with two more packages. Both contained shipments of yarn from the US. Finally I can start knitting the mohawk hat with the yarn I'm supposed to use! I'll make two black ones to start with, one for me and one for a fellow Depechist girl friend of mine. And, if I can be bothered, I'll make a black and grey version of the hat seen on the cover - which requires a whole pile of intarsia knitting. Which I hate. time will show. The white and blue slightly furry mohair-yarn is intended for a stripey, comfy sweater which is supposedly very easy to make. We'll see about that, too. With all of this lying in my living room waiting for me, they sort of dictate my weekend activities. Seeing as I have yet to celebrate my birthday properly, I will, however, consume at least one bottle of wine tonight, be it alone or with some classmates (or maybe even the beforementioned Depechist, if she can come, yay.)

My dog, however, doesn't give a flying f*** about knitting, records or my birthday. All is well in her world as long as she gets to kill my Chtulu Plushie. Having a dogs life does seem tempting sometimes...

Regression

Like idol, like fan? Any similarities are purely coincidental. *cough*

While everyone is talking about the financial crisis, recessions and depressions, I am my self coping with a regression of my own. I'm slowly, but steadily, regressing back to the 80s. Not in a "I'm going back to teats and diapers and milk in a bottle" sort of way. I mean more generally, as in going back to the 80s as a decade filled with weird music and even weirder clothing. By now you all know about (and am sick of hearing about) my slight obsession with a certain band, but in the last month I've been stuck on the old, poppy, 80s Depeche. Now, bands like that during the 80s could have rather extreme and experimental images, and I guess at least some parts of Depeche would fall nicely into that category. And, of course, me being all young and impressionable gets inspired by such things as Martin Gore's somewhat outrageous bondage outfits of the 80s. Relax, I'm staying well away from Mart's harnesses, chains, black leather shorts and handcuffs (well, about the handcuffs... Nevermind, let's not go there). But I have gone rather retro in my shopping of late, buying very bleached jeans, a bikers cap, hats... Well, see for yourself.

This is why days off are useless to me: I end up being restless and bored, go out on some impulse to the mall and end up with this:
Slight shopping spree... Leggings with "rivets", leg warmers, a large singlet and some large comfy tops, a vest, a hat and a few leather armbands ala 80s.

In other news
I'm mostly preoccupided with school these days, studying hygiene, microbiology, how to isolate contagions and so on. Yes, I'm weird, I love microbiology, and take pride in knowing silly words such as meticillinresistant staphylococcus aureus, hyaluronidase and Escherichia Coli - AND knowing what those are. My class consist of somewhere between 150-200 students, we're all divided into two major groups A and B, which is then divided into groups of 15 people who tend to do practical lectures and assignments together. Yesterday I was suprisingly, by popular vote, given the "honorary post". Basically I'm the groups representative, they can come to me if they have something to adress or if there's a problem. It's nice knowing people trust you with these sort of chores, but I will forever wonder what it is about me that invokes peoples trust. When I was in Africa a few years ago, some of the girls started calling me "mummy Emmy", so I might be some sort of maternal figure. God knows.

More tickets?!
Yesterday 9000 Depeche-tickets were made available for purchase. They're doing two shows in Horsens, Denmark in late Febuary, and in the context of this tour the shows are rather special in the fact that they will "only" have an audience of about 4500 each night, as opposed to their normal crowd of between 20 and 100 000. These "intimate" concerts are held in what is supposed to be one of the best acoustic musical halls in Denmark (but that might just be the arranger boasting). To me and a fellow Depeche devotional I've met through forums, this sounded too good to be true, so we tried to get tickets. I hate doing that, by the way. Sitting by the computer, watching the time, counting down, pressing refresh, just waiting for that exact moment the page makes the bloody tickets available. Thankfully I was quick enough, and got my grubby hands on tickets for the tuesday show. A very nice mate of mine had agreed to help me out, and tried to get tickets for monday - and the real kicker is that he got in queue and had tickets. But, as he tried to press the blasted "pay" button, which should've directed him to a site where he could fill in (my) credit card info, this happened in stead: he got an error message saying his payment was rejected, which is especially mind-boggling when you consider the fact that he hadn't typed in anything, and in the end he got redirected to the front page, and fell out of queue. Tickets for both shows were gone in 12 minutes, so I guess I should shut up, thank my lucky stars and quit complaining.

Mad Hatter 2 - post felting

Turned out too small, as I knew it would, but otherwise it's all right. Since I didn't use quite the right yarn, the mohawk got a bit more compact then I wanted it too, but that'll probably be better once I get the proper yarn. Need to find someone small-headed I can push this mohawk hat on, though, don't want it to just be left lying around.

Mad hatter!

Am soon finished with the mohawk test hat! Needs some more 'hawk fringes and felting, which will make it look more like an actual mohawk and less like spaghetti yarn flopping around. Am pleased with how it's turning out tho - but felting can either make it brilliant og totally ruin it. Ordered proper yarn today, too - can't wait!

Weekend!

... the collection grows some more...
Gotta stop buying these, soon...

Yay, it's the weekend, I have friends and a cousin coming over for a party, I feel on top of everything at school AND my vinyl collection grew a bit more today! All is well! The only thing this weekend is missing is an Arsenal-match. Cheers!

That time of the month...

Seeing as I am a hormonal, candy-munching girly-girl with a breakout of acne these days, a post like this one was sort of inevitable. I apologize in advance.

So, what makes a moody house-elf with the cramps happy? New shoes, of course! And lo and behold, a large box of them arrived in the mail today. I bought them at Delia's, on clearance, and paid about 110$ for them - including shipping and horrible customs this came closer to 220, but that's still not bad for 3 pairs of shoes. Should be set for winter!

Another thing that arrived in the mail was this book, and I have already started on a test knit on the mohawk hat. It's not the right gauge needles or the right yarn, so it'll probably come out all wonky and the wrong size, but it's nice to have some practice before starting ruining proper yarn. If it turns out all right, I have a few more to knit for friends, and I'll probably end up living in my hat all winter! Along with my perdy new shoes.

Sad?

This is what I do with my spare time. Very sensible, no? Yay for Sunbird. Click the image for a larger version, fool.

Yes, I plot in the Arsenal matches too.

Progress!

A year ago, being up, out of bed and dressed by 12 would count as a personal victory, and the start of a potentially very good day, both mentally and physically.

Fast forward to today and I was sitting in front of my computer (as I also was more than likely to do a year ago) and I was thinking to myself "bah, I feel like I haven't lifted a finger today. I'm useless." But when I started to recap what I'd done during the day, and this was what I came up with:

New curtains!

• Was out of bed by 9.30, and babysat a puking dog
• Washed 2 machines of laundry, and hanged it up
• Moved all the furniture around in my bedroom, and tidied up
  
• Vacuumed said bedroom, and the hall
• Did my homework
• Made dinner
• Hanged curtains in the livingroom and bedroom
  
• Hanged posters and a picture
• Walked the dog
• Threw out the trash

A year ago this list would've been an insurmountable mountain, and not something I would've had the capacity to do within a day. And today I didn't even think about it, I just did. Amazing how far you can come in a year. Now I just gotta keep this up.

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